![]() Wait ‘til they land! Then go up the clay pigeon. And clay pigeons – everyone shoots them in the air. Shooting clay – clay pigeons – the fuckers! Come round your house, whiz through – “fwhooo, fwhooo, fwhooo!” They do nothing – they don’t even eat – flies! You know? Spiders eat flies, so they’re all right, you know – spiders keep them, you know – flies don’t eat fuckalls, so kill ‘em. I just think just standing there going, “Bang!” That’s not going to kill too many people, is it? You’d have to be really dodgy on the heart to have that – “Bang! Bang! Boom! Bang! Rat-a-tat boom! Bang!” I think they should just try that, you know.īut, uh, yeah, shooting clay pigeons, I think, yeah, go for that. You know.Īnd there is – they say – the National Rifle Association says that, “Guns don’t kill people, uh, people do.” But I think – I think the gun helps. There’s all this National Rifle Association and everyone in America is – I mean 13 year olds keep going out and they borrow – they get a hold of weapons from their grandfather’s arsenal – “I’ll borrow the Howitzer, the M16 machine gun, the Uzi, the” – what the fuck’s the grandfather doing? Th – This kid down in Arkansas just helped himself to a ton of military weapons and went and blew away his school. It seems fun – there’s this thing of power in your hands. The gun thing, I liked blowing up milk bottles. And, umm – the running jumping climbing trees is, not the squirrel bit, the – the trees bit.Īnd I was! I was into – I loved the army stuff, which is the running, jumping, standing still, found you, ah ha, flag, look, hat, you know. And they always eat n – squirrels always eat nuts with two hands, always two hands, arararar, and occasionally, they stop and go, oh, uh, ah, as if they’re going, “Did I leave the gas on? No! I’m – no – I’m a fucking squirrel!” And occasionally they go, “Fucking nuts! Fed up with them always. And sometimes I’d get up that tree and that squirrel would be covered in makeup! “La la, la la, oh, oh. And uh, and the squirrel would keep makeup on one side, and he’d keep nuts on the other side. That’s where it is.Īnd I used to keep my makeup in a squirrel hole, up the tree. ![]() So running, jumping, climbing trees, putting on makeup when you’re up there. ![]() And gay men I think would agree.Īnd uh, it’s – it’s male lesbian, that’s really where it is, ok? Because – it’s true! Cause most transvestites fancy girls. And people do get that mixed up – they put transvestite there – no no no no! Little bit of a crowbar separation, thank you. ![]() Yeah, its – it’s not drag queen no, gay men have got that covered. Cause – cause if you’re a transvestite, you’re actually a male tomboy. And I say that and people go, ohhhyuhyuhyuh, no I was, I was going to be in the army when I was a kid. Yes, so, um, uh, I was going to be in the army when I was a kid. You know, its – end of your life, it’s quite difficult. Yes, I’m a professional transvestite so I can run about in heels and not fall over cause, uh, you know, if women fall over wearing heels, ah, that’s embarrassing, but if a bloke falls over wearing heels, then you have to kill yourself. His recent London acting credits also include The Cryptogram and 900 Oneonta.In heels as well. By sticking to topics most Americans and Europeans have in common.he minimized the gulf."Īn Olivier-Award nominee, Izzard's previous shows in the West End included Ambassadors, Unrepeatable, and Definite Article. He began each routine with a mundane subject and embellished, abstracted and analyzed it until it evolved into a surreal fantasy. The New York Times' Neil Strauss wrote of that show, " routines on different subjects tended to spiral into one another and meet at different tangents, so that he could set up running jokes. So popular and well-reviewed was Izzard's first, self-titled engagement in NYC, he ended up giving an extra performance in a larger space just to accommodate ticket demand. The latter show, Glorious, premiered in Manhattan and then hit Paris, London, and the UK provinces. His previous shows played at Off-Off-Broadway's P.S. Izzard honed his latest piece at the Stamford Center for the Arts, the Toronto Harborfront Theatre and the Aspen Comedy Festival before coming to Manhattan. 26, was supposed to close in early June but then extended to July 11. Yankee audiences have just a few more nights to catch British comedian Eddie Izzard in his solo, Dress To Kill, at NY's Westbeth Theatre Center.
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